I am in a Crater That’s No More


I’m in a crater that’s no more“-
Kafka on the shore

I don’t want your damaged little heart
To slice through mine like a sharpened knife
Caught up in that cool little spot
Of wisdom and talking for the very first time

You are made up of all those pieces
That existed in a world I left far behind
And your sudden call is a repetition
Of memories I have no strength left to find

It may almost seem like a warning although
You have no idea what you are doing
But nothing will work to stop the flow
Once this bleeding soul gets going

Perhaps I need a lesson in what works
And what doesn’t when it comes to life
But it’s almost as though my floating Titanic
Is heading for a collision against your ice

This strange summation is a warning
I might want to steer right clear of you
Since I don’t believe in prophesizing callings
And crying is just something little girls do.

I wonder if this happens to everybody. Intense periods of self-loathing which reduce the meaning of everything in life to a single point- am I even real? How genuine am I? What am I feeling? Is it the truth or an illusion? Am I lying to myself? To others? Am I following my heart or just mirroring the needs and longings of other people? Is there even an answer.

So to sum up this amalgamation of weird thoughts, I’ll just share words of wisdom my best friend told me:

Everyone has scars. It’s what you do with it. Aren’t you a better, smarter person with a scar? Don’t worry. The fact is, you will probably not forget it. But it won’t be a burden to live with. Just chill.

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