A Recipe! And Some Candid Thoughts (As Usual)


Something I’ve never done here before. But. I was mixing ingredients today after getting over a bad day that involved a lot of walking in the hot Phoenix sun than I had anticipated. And came up with something that turned out to be surprisingly easy and yummy. Since I haven’t blogged for a while, I thought I might just share this—are you ready for it? A recipe!

(This feels weird already).

Ingredients:

1/2 a cup cottage cheese
1/2 a cup shredded spinach
2 eggs
Salt and pepper to taste
Vegetable oil

Here’s what you do: whisk the eggs, add the spinach and and cheese. Add salt to taste. Pour the mixture onto an oiled pan and scramble until the eggs are cooked. Sprinkle pepper. Comes out a pretty green:

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PS: I’ve been thinking lately of taking Blue Loft in a different direction, since that’s the direction my life is going in right now. I still love poetry and fiction but…strangely, that’s not where I am at anymore.

I think I’ll be honest here: The past few years of writing made me feel that there was something missing in the kind of writing I pursued. The truth was, I was scared of venturing into deeper waters while writing prose; poetry is easy because you can hide behind obtuse metaphors and THAT is the whole point and beauty of poetry for me! But prose is…harder. You need to polish it more for perfection. And I just want’s good enough for myself.

So I thought I would venture out into the world and return to fictional prose when I was…maybe forty. In the meantime, I can still write but that’s how long I ha(ve/d) decided to wait before attempting something ambitious like a novel. I figured, by forty I would have amassed a wealth of wisdom, probably some sort of discipline and the kind of research skills that would be useful for writing a novel. I also figured I would have seen enough of the world to KNOW what I wanted to write about. I didn’t have a concrete plan for how I was going to do it (I never have had concrete plans with my life before, cue the music for why I made such a big mess of life).

Strangely, the past few months have taught me that things CAN fall into place once you start to listen, however unconsciously, to that sound deep inside your heart that keeps nudging you into the directions you want to go. Not only have I unknowingly made some really great choices, it seems that things are…somehow aligning. Even if it all goes kind of downhill from here, I wouldn’t regret 90% of the decisions I made in 2014-2015. The remaining 10% will most likely be fashion choices.

Coming back to the question of prose: while deciding to not attempt to write a novel before forty (a decision I will be pretty flexible with as life plays out), it did strike me that along the way, I would….change. Somehow I have been a writer since I was six and I am sure that I will be that for as long as I live, even if it is not in the ways I had initially dreamt of. So I wasn’t afraid that I would want to stop writing though I have had my fair share of that fear as a teenager. But what I didn’t anticipate was that I might wish to move away from fiction. I tell myself every day that I will return, as a long-lost friend, to that world of imagination. But somehow, right now the real world has pulled me into it. It seems more fascinating than fiction…with fiction too I had been venturing into the unknown, trying to be as adventurous as I could with the books I read. And, for now…fiction isn’t what I spend my days dreaming of. Perhaps when real life is a drudgery, turning to fiction is the most logical and sensible thing to do to retain your sanity. But when real life plays out far more interesting things for you to donate your energy to, fiction CAN slip into the background.

I guess what I am trying to say is that I have found new places to forcefully attempt to pour creativity into right now. Cooking isn’t it though, despite how I started this post: please don’t think that’s where I’m going with this. And so…to come back to the point in a very round-about manner, I have been thinking about taking Blue Loft in a different direction. I have thought about starting a new blog because this has just…been about creative writing so far. But it has also been about my journey (?). Blurbs of life can be edited and so, blurbs of blogs can most DEFINITELY be too. Well, this is a rant. Something I’m great at. But it remains to be seen if I can and will be good at something else.

Jeez, here is a twist that I never saw coming!

OR maybe this is just all a big, fat, beautiful excuse for procrastinating novel writing until I’m too old to give a f***.